A walk down Memory Lane?
by The Vicious One
Summary: Mewtwo and Lugia as you never seen them before...or have you? PG-13 for some innuendo and brief language. Plus, take a walk down memory lane!


A Walk Down Memory Lane?  
  
Disclaimer: I'm back? Where'd I go???  
  
  
(Last week on a very special Mewtwo and Lugia)  
  
Suicune busts in.  
  
Suicune: Hey, Lugia. Smell my paw.  
Lugia: (Smells it) What's that?  
Suicune: That means your becoming a manly pokémon, dude!  
  
(A car drives by U.D.)  
  
Lugia: (Sing-song voice) Hey, guys. I got an idea.  
Mewtwo: What is it?  
Lugia: Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Truth...  
Mewtwo: or...  
Mew: DARE!!!  
  
(A Snubbull and Meowth fight)  
  
Lugia: Good God, this opeing's going nowhere!  
Mewtwo: Let's just start this!  
  
(Cue Mewtwo and Lugia opening a la 'The Munsters')  
  
Mewtwo and Lugia  
  
(Mewtwo comes out of Unknown Dungeon)  
  
(Mewtwo still) Starring Mewtwo  
  
(Lugia comes out next, and does a high five with Mewtwo)  
  
(Lugia still) Lugia  
  
(Celebi just flies out of U.D. and past Mewtwo and Lugia. He returns and smiles)  
  
(Celebi still) Celebi  
  
(Mew comes out and kisses Celebi. He blushes and flies off)  
  
(Mew still) Mew  
  
(Finally, Suicune comes out)  
  
(Suicune still) And Suicune  
  
(Suicune and Lugia leave. Mewtwo re-enters U.D.)  
  
Directed by Vicious Mewtwo  
  
Lugia: Mewtwo and Lugia was seen by a live studio audience.  
  
(Pan into U.D. Mewtwo is asleep on his couch. The phone rings)  
  
Mewtwo: (No response)  
  
(Subtitle: 15 minutes later...)  
  
Mewtwo: (No response)  
  
(Subtitle: 1 hour later...)  
  
Mewtwo: ... (wakes up) FOR GOD'S SAKE, JUST HANG UP!!!  
  
(The phone stops)  
  
Mewtwo: Thank you. (Falls asleep again) (Lugia busts in)  
Lugia: HO-LY CRAP! GET UP, MEWTWO!  
Mewtwo: What now, Lugia? I'm tryin' to get some sleep!  
Lugia: It's-it's-it's...Oh, God...It's bad.  
Mewtwo: What?  
Lugia: Um...uh...  
Mewtwo: ...Don't tell me...you're doing this to get me up, am I right?  
Lugia: Um......yes...  
Mewtwo: Lugia, go home before I call the cops.  
Lugia: Ok.  
  
Lugia leaves, but then comes back in with a semi-automatic rifle in hand. He fires a few shots outside of U.D.  
  
Lugia: Yeah, and tell your mothers I'm waiting for them, AT WHIRL ISLANDS! (Slams door) Damn, Mewtwo. It's a living nightmare out there!  
Mewtwo: What now?  
Lugia: This giant, um...what's that one that breaks things?  
Mewtwo: Tyranitar?  
Lugia: Yeah, I think that's him.  
Mewtwo: Wait a second...TYRANITAR?!?  
  
He immediately heads out the door passing up Team Rocket who is destroying Celadon City and heads directly to Silver Cave.  
  
Tyranitar: Huh?  
Mewtwo: Why are terrorizing Celadon again?  
Tyranitar: What'd I do, boss?  
Mewtwo: Shut up. (Psyblasts him) Now, get back on the couch and go to sleep.  
  
He leaves and heads back to Celadon. The Dept. Store is now a ruin.  
  
Lugia: It was horrible, dude. They got bombs, and blew the whole damn thing up!  
Mewtwo: And who is 'they'?  
Lugia: Team Rocket.  
Mewtwo: Eh, it's just them. Let's get lunch.  
Lugia: It's 9:42.  
Mewtwo: Then let's get brunch.  
Lugia: No, we're going to IHOPPIP.  
Mewtwo: I...HOP...PIP?  
Lugia: Yeah. "International House of Pancakes."  
Mewtwo: What aout the P, I, and P?  
Lugia: Oh. Those letters?  
Mewtwo: Yeah.  
Lugia: Ummm...Celebi told me, but it would be too much for the kids watching at home, soooooo, I think it'd be best if I said it in your ear.  
Mewtwo: Shoot, then.  
Lugia: (Whispers something in his ear)  
Mewtwo: Oh, God! That's....that's...that's wrong!  
Lugia: Sick, but true.  
Mewtwo: Let's just go.  
  
Later, at the IHOPPIP...  
  
Mewtwo: It's gotta be a lie!  
Celebi: I know it's sick, but it ain't no lie. (Pun intended)  
Mewtwo: Well, anyways, what's been happening with yourself?  
Celebi: Weeeeeell, it's been tough these days. Last week, me and Fox McCloud scored a gig on Monty Arbok's Flying Circus.  
Lugia: Yeah, The Lumberjack Song!  
  
(Flashback begins)  
  
Celebi: I cut down trees, I skip and jump, I like to press wildflowers.  
Fox McCloud: I like to wear women's clothing, and hang around in bars.  
Celebi: Wha? He's a lumberjack, and he's ok. He sleeps all night and he works   
all day.  
Director: Ok, ok, cut!  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Celebi: Ah, what wonderful memories!  
Mewtwo: Big deal. I just scored me a gig on Sunday Night Live!  
  
(Flashback wavy lines, but no flashback)  
  
Mewtwo: Yeah, that was cool.  
Lugia: Mewtwo, you're a stupid dumbass.  
  
Mew comes in looking for Celebi.  
  
Mew: CELEBI-SAN!!!  
Celebi: Oh...no... (Gets glomped by Mew)  
Mew: Oh, hi, guys!  
Mewtwo and Lugia: (Annoyed) Hi, Mew...  
Lugia: She just never quits...  
Mewtwo: I know...like this one time where Mew and Celebi slow-danced to 'Overcome' and they started getting icky and gooey and stuff.  
Lugia: YECH!  
  
(Flashback begins)  
  
Celebi: Mew...I just can't...I can't say...  
Mew: Say what?  
Celebi: ...I love you...  
Mew: (shocked) Celebi! I...  
  
and I am overcome  
I am overcome  
Holy water in my lungs  
I am overcome  
  
Mew: Celebi, I don't know what to say...  
Celebi: Me neither...  
Mew: All except...I love you too...  
Celebi: Mew...  
Mew: Oh, Celebi...  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Lugia: Mewtwo...I just lost my appetite.  
Mewtwo: Fine, more pancakes for me! (Eats Lugia's pancakes)  
Celebi: Oh, come on. That song we slow-dance too?! Please. I got one.  
Mew: Oh, yes...remember...the tree in Ilex?  
Lugia: No, not that one! NOT THAT ONE!!!  
  
(Flashback begins)  
  
Mew: Isn't the stars beautiful, Celebi?  
Celebi: Yes...um, Mew. I need to tell you something.  
Mew: Yes?  
Celebi: Looking in your eyes...it makes me feel weird...like I wanna...  
Mew: Yes?  
Celebi: ...kiss you.  
Mew: Oh, Celebi!  
Celebi: With tongue.  
Mew: Ooooooh, you're making me feel funny.  
Celebi: I love you, Mew.  
Mew: Give it now.  
  
They french kiss each other.  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Lugia: O-o-o-h, G-od! I don't feel so good... (Boots up, and runs to the bathroom) (SPLOOSH!)  
Mewtwo: Ugh! That didn't sound good.  
Mew: Aw, Lugia just hasn't experienced love yet.  
Celebi: You know, Mewtwo. When me and Mew kiss...it kinda gives me a special feeling...  
Mewtwo: Celebi, do you realize your sexual innuendo is riddling my mind with unpleasant scenes?  
Mew: Celebi, I can't stand it. Let's go to the bathroom...together.  
Celebi: Oh, yeah!  
  
They head off for the bathroom.  
  
Lugia: (From inside the bathroom) GOOD GOD!!!  
Mewtwo: Oh, my!  
  
Lugia walks back to where Mewtwo is.  
  
Lugia: I think I'm never gonna go Ilex Forest ever again. Celebi is a sick little nympho.  
Mewtwo: "Nympho"? What's that?  
Lugia: Your mind is too riddled already, so I won't say anything.  
  
(Subtitle: 1 hour later...)  
  
Mewtwo: Hey, Lugia. Remember that time we prank called Giovanni?  
Lugia: Hmmm...  
  
(Flashback begins)  
  
(RIIIIING!)  
  
Gio.: Hello?  
  
(FLUSH!!!)  
  
Lugia: That was cool.  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Lugia: We just flushed a toilet?  
Mewtwo: I think we did something else...  
  
(Flashback continues)  
  
(RIIIIING!)  
  
Gio.: Uh, hello?  
Mewtwo: Um...uh, YOU SUCK!  
  
(FLUSH!!!)  
  
Lugia: That was pretty funny, Mewtwo.  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Mewtwo: Yeah, that was funny...  
Lugia: Wait...wasn't there more?  
  
(Flashback continues again)  
  
(RIIIIING! RING!)  
  
Gio.: HELLO?!  
  
(FLUSH!!!)  
  
Giovanni just slams the phone down angrily.  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Lugia: Dude, this is getting boring.  
Mewtwo: ...Wait, what about that other time?  
  
(Flashback continues yet again)  
  
(RIIIIING! RING!)  
  
Gio.: Yeah?!  
  
Lugia's taking a dump and Mewtwo puts the phone in the toilet so Giovanni hear and then...  
  
(FLUSH!!!)  
  
Mewtwo: (On the phone) IT'S GAY FANNY!!!  
  
He slams the phone and looks at the caller ID. Their number is 555-0551.  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Mewtwo: No...that wasn't it.  
Lugia: Of course it wasn't! What did you think I was trying to say to you?!  
Mewtwo: ...Hey, remember when Giovanni got at Prof. Oak?  
Lugia: Oh, yeah! That's it!  
  
(Flashback continues once more)  
  
Oak gets tackled by Giovanni and he starts to drag him to the bathroom.  
  
Oak: Hey, this is between you and Ash! GET HIM, AAAHHH!!! PLEASE!  
  
He shoved him down the toilet and flushed it.  
  
Gio.: YOU LIKE THE WAY THAT SOUNDS, FUNNY MAN?!? HUH?!?  
Oak: NOOOO!!! YOU MUST THINK ASH! AAAHHH!!!  
Gio.: LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY, FUNNY MAN! If you ever, EVER, call me again, I swear, I'll find you, wherever you are, and I'll gut you! But just to make sure you don't call me...  
  
He grabs Oak's phone and pulls down his pants.  
  
Gio.: I'm gonna stick your phone where you'll have an awful hard time dailing it!  
Oak: No, please, no! (SQUISH!!!) YAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!  
  
(Flashback ends)  
  
Lugia: Heh heh, that was cool.  
Mewtwo: Sure it was.  
  
Celebi and Mew finally come back.  
  
Mewtwo: (sarcasticly) Did you two have fun?  
Celebi: You know, making love to Mew is so fun.  
Mew: You said a mouthful there, Celebi!  
Celebi: Hey, you're the one with the mouthful! (They french kiss)  
Lugia: Mewtwo, I was just thinking. Maybe someday that Vicious kid'll write a Mew/Celebi lemon. Do you think he will?  
Mewtwo: Eh, probably. Who knows what evil lurks in that kid's twisted mind.  
  
Back at U.D...  
  
Suicune: Hey! How come I wasn't in this show?!  
  
(Dead silence)  
  
Suicune: Oh, nice work there, Jerry!  
  
(Fade to black...)  
  
(Next week on Mewtwo and Lugia...)  
  
Mewtwo: Let's call that Gay Fanny dude again!  
Lugia: Yeah, Gay Fanny.  
  
They go into the bathroom and...  
  
Gio.: (On the phone) Hello?  
  
(FLUSH!!!)  
  
  
NOTE: If anyone under the age of 11 reads this, I want to let you know that I am not responsible for any damage to your brain cells getting damaged by this weird fic. Thank you.  
  
(Credits roll with scenery a la 'Get Smart')  
  
Mewtwo walks down the hall of Unknown Dungeon. When he reaches the end, 3 of the back doors of U.D. lock behind him. Mewtwo turns around to go back, but the last doors swing shut and hit him in the face.  
  
Mewtwo: (Walking away with left hand on his face) Ow, son of a...  
  
VICIOUS MEWTWO FANFICTIONS  
  
END!!! 


End file.
